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"Your 'reality', sir, is lies and balderdash and I'm delighted to say that I have no grasp of it whatsoever."
— Karl Friedrich Hieronymus, Freiherr von M√ľnchhausen

Order of the Stick #248

More cryptographic goodness.

Vaarsuvius: Yes, I'm afraid I must concur with Master Thundershield's diagnosis. There is no mystical genesis for the condition, so my arcane power, mighty though it may be, cannot remove it.

Durkon: Och, I was afraid o' dat when Thor's magic could na heal her.

Roy: Hey, gang, what's going on? No wait, let me guess. Haley's selling her tooth fillings to V for a quick profit, right?

Durkon: Actually, it be bad news fer the lass.

Belkar: (aside) And good news for fans of cryptograms.

Vaarsuvius: Miss Starshine appears to have been rendered incapable of properly articulating herself verbally.

Roy: What??

Haley: It means my speech is all funny-sounding.

Vaarsuvius: Yes, as you can hear, she can only enunciate gibberish.

Roy: My gods! Haley! I am so sorry! This is all my fault!

Haley: Come again?

Roy: I kept telling her to shut up, because she was making fun of me. And now she can't speak! She's clearly suffering from some sort of curse that I brought upon her!

Roy: (crying) Forgive me, Haley! Forgive me! I should never have said that to you!

Haley: Can somebody please get weepy transsexual off me?

Vaarsuvius: Actually, we believe that she is suffering from hysterical aphasia as a result of the mental trauma associated with the destruction of the treasure.

Roy: Oh. Never mind, then.

Vaarsuvius: Although, I suppose there would never have been an explosion in the first place if you had refrained from prentending to be —

Roy: I think I said NEVER. MIND. THEN.

Belkar: Could you hug Haley again for a moment? I need to capture the mental image for later.

Incidentally, it appears that there is an inconsistency in the cipher, and I am wondering whether I should email Rich Burlew about it. "T" in panel 3 should translate to "S", ("It means my speech is all funny-sounding") whereas "T" in panel 6 should translate to "R" ("Can somebody please get weepy transsexual off me?"). Does anyone see my mistake? Or do you agree that it's an error in the source?

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